Fatigue continues to cling on to me,
my right shoulder+neck continues to be an issue,
I have (some) friends who say they don't know anything but in fact they are knowledgeable,
I ain't academically inclined,
my brain isn't functional.
At least I am truthful.
In my humanities group project I have members who are just too awesome, using English structures and vocabularies which doesn't even draws out from me. That totally blends me out.
Politics class I can't make up of what's going on and the assessment is mainly essays. How am I even going to hit 1000 words?
My main core module, programming, does not seems to be in sync for me. Only understood 1/10. Sit-in-lab and announcing Mid-term tests just has to happen to stir the feeling.
My ears seems to be in conflict with the grey matter and Trance music doesn't calm me down or rather the energy does not even enter my nerves.
I am putting up a strong front, looking all tough on the external, laughing and smiling but obviously this will end up me breaking emotionally much easier and swiftly.
This is just way overly depressing, where one day I might just stay late in campus, sit down in one corner of a stairwell and let it all out.
Praying doesn't seem to enable guidance anymore, the road is just rocky and the weather is much of a typhoon 24/7.
And no I don't write this asking for symphathy.
Obviously, seeking help is much of a disdain since everyone would be busy with themselves. Disheartened writer signing off.
Sounds like you're either a poly student or a college student. If poly, go get help. Seriously. If college, then I presume you haven't finished first semester in first year. Don't be so hard on yourself first. Truth is most people are struggling but most at college level won't show it. Try to finish one semester first. Why? The bell curve does wonders.
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